Mar 232011
 

I just saw that Elizabeth Taylor is dead. Being that she was a great…woman, this can only mean one thing: Elton John or some other close, personal friend in the music business is going to need to quickly retro-fit a forgotten deep cut to play at her international day of mourning and rebranding. Townspeople, act fast and help an appropriate artist identify the appropriate song for this occasion. Saccharine montages and a sudden turn in a sagging artist’s fortunes depend on your input. Thank you.

NEXT: Rock Town Hall’s Official Eulogy…

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  11 Responses to “Elizabeth Taylor Dead: Quick! What’s Gonna Be Her “Candle in the Wind?””

  1. 2000 Man

    Pinetop’s Boogie Woogie by Pinetop Perkins? Someone’s gotta do something to get people to notice that another blues legend is gone.

  2. misterioso

    “Candle in the Wind (2011).” Elton and Liz were pals, after all.

  3. Kinks – “Celluloid Heroes”? Add a few lines for Liz and the song would work.

    “I wish my life was a non-stop Hollywood movie show,
    A fantasy world of celluloid villains and heroes,
    Because celluloid heroes never feel any pain
    And celluloid heroes never really die”

  4. Blue Oyster Cult should refit “Joan Crawford” as “Liz Taylor.”

  5. Elton could re-do MJ’s “Ben” as “Liz”.

  6. shawnkilroy

    Maneater-Hall & Oates

  7. Fat Bottomed Girls — Queen

  8. 2000 Man

    Hey, Golden Earring could re do Just Like Vince Taylor as Just Like Liz Taylor!

  9. 2000 Man

    That’s a shampoo commercial now.

  10. cliff sovinsanity

    Pale Blue Eyes – Velvet Underground

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