Sep 092012
 

Our new best friends over at Touchstone Books (a Division of Simon & Schuster) have given us three copies of the new Freddie Mercury biography. More information about the book is below the fold. To win a brand new copy of your very own simply comment with a link to an image of a music-related personality that rocks the cop ‘stache as well as or better than the late great Freddie Mercury. It’s just that easy.

ENTRIES MUST BE RECEIVED BY 11:59 PM, THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 13, 2012.

Here are some real cop ‘staches for guidance.

For what it’s worth, according to the pros over at Mustache Summer.

The Police Departments in Los Angeles and elsewhere have a Dress Code for their officers, which details how an officer is to present himself. One of the areas covered is facial hair, which is only allowed in the form of a mustache, and cannot extend below the corner of the mouth. If a police officer wants to grow whiskers, he must grow a ‘stache. That mustachio’d cop on the corner may be burning for a goatee or a Soul Patch, but departmental regulations help keep him from making a horrible mistake.

Also, to ensure complete objectivity in judging, we have enlisted a celebrity to make the calls. Our guest judge is…

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  74 Responses to “Win a Copy of
MERCURY: An Intimate Biography of Freddie Mercury
Just Meet or Beat the Cop ‘Stache

  1. Greg Norton of Husker Du had a number of mustache styles going on — but here’s a nice cop version.

    http://minnewiki.publicradio.org/index.php/Image:Husker_du1.jpg

  2. Great ‘stache, but inelligible:

    cannot extend below the corner of the mouth

    George Steinbrenner had the same rules for mustaches on the Yankees, didn’t he?

  3. “On the bass, Derek Smalls! He wrote this.”

    http://www.clashmusic.com/artists/spinal-tap

  4. ohmstead

    Phil Collins as Bath House owner Eddie Papasano in the “And the Band Played On”

    http://www.dvdbeaver.com/film/DVDReviews7/andthebandplayedon/2.JPG

  5. My problem with both the Dylan and the Brian Ferry ‘stache is that they are both going for a smarmy/hip look. Their ‘stahces are sculpted, as opposed to someone who just didn’t shave under their nose, such as Bill Keurtzman: http://digitaljournal.com/img/8/7/3/i/1/1/4/o/Bill-Kreutzmann.jpg

  6. Or that guy from the Atlanta Rhythm Section who appears to have opted for some white Sans-a-Belt trousers on the day of the big photo shoot: http://d.yimg.com/ec/image/v1/release/41626287;encoding=jpg;size=300;fallback=defaultImage

    By the way, there is a picture of one of our fellow townsmen on their band’s facebook page sporting what looks to me like a non-ironic cop stache. In the interest of keeping things civil, I will not out him.

  7. 2000 Man

    The only thing I think of whenever I see Dylan and that hat and that stache is that he desperately wants Chuck Norris to notice him.

  8. Agreed, cdm. No self-respecting cop shaves the hair that goes right up to his nostrils.

  9. All the Sgt Pepper era Beatles seem to sport cop staches, but those photos exude so much peace and love, you can’t imagine one of them being a cop.

  10. schneids

    randy meisner, on the right, from eagles (no “the”)
    http://www.angelfire.com/rock3/deliverin/MEISNER/Images/Eagles1972.jpg

    here’s a better shot of him toeing the “lip line”!
    http://www.randymeisneronline.com/images/side03.jpg

  11. http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/_/43439013/Boston.jpg

    Brad Delp would like to see your license and Barry Goodreau would like to see your registration please.

  12. DAMNIT! I thought we were going to be charged with raising our own cop ‘stache in pursuit of the prize. And being about a month away from rocking a half-way-there Bangladesh George goatee, visions of Free Bios danced in my head as I celebrated my head-start on the Town Hall

    And I ain’t stooping to no Village People entry. I’ll just buy it when I see it.

    aloha
    LD

  13. Officer Walsh mustache you a few questions about your whereabouts on the night of the incident.

    http://nakeddc.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/walsh.jpg

    (He’s even got the glasses).

  14. pudman13

    I always thought Wilson pikcett had a kiler ‘stache: http://www.6lyrics.com/images/artists/wilson_pickett.jpg

  15. pudman13

    oops…sorry about that typo…

  16. Gerry Todd

    I posted my definitive answer in the All-Star Jam. AND I did it before this contest was opened. So, like, bonus points! I should win at least 2 of the 3 if not all 3 of the books.

  17. I’ll throw in this has been and hope it’s a link you can reach..
    http://media.photobucket.com/image/recent/evielust/bloggery/Oates.jpg

  18. ladymisskirroyale

    There are cop ‘staches and there are COP ‘staches. And of course you know who was the biggest, baddest cop of them all! But did you know Der Fuhrer was also a song and dance man?

    Here he is singin’ the blues (starting at 4:29):
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K08akOt2kuo

    Later, he plays the bass at (6:54).

  19. Why, oh why didn’t I think of Oats?! He set the standard.

  20. ohmstead

    OK Ladymiss – I will see your dancing ‘stached dictator and raise you one singing dictator with much, much superior ‘stashes.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YtdHG0wF_Zc&feature=youtube_gdata_player

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ag3nCyZZSBg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

  21. Like cdm said, how did he stay on the board so long? Oates was like a 1-man buddy cop duo.

  22. Steinbrenner Violation!

  23. ladymisskirroyale

    Stalin, schmalin. Even almost 40 years later, Hitler shows can he still be a chorus boy hoofer: (at 3:55)

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rNXj-SCx5dY

  24. Way too long. Once the mustache tips begin curving south it’s important to examine whether they break the plane of the bottom lip. If so, the mustache is not cop approved – at least not in our law-abiding country.

  25. meanstom

    Beside John Oates’ cop ‘stache do you honestly think any of the other contestants offered so far put even half the effort into abiding by the laws governing cop ‘staches as Freddie did?
    http://www.syffal.com/userfiles/image/freddie.jpg

    The midwest smalltown cop ‘stache of Weezer’s Rivers Cuomo has got to be considered.
    http://radiofreechicago.typepad.com/.a/6a00d83451b93369e20134865ed7eb970c-320wi

  26. Jon Oates
    There is a pic of a barechested Jon Oates with his thick, I think copstache. Its the first photo from the top as you scroll down.
    To me his stache looks kind of like one of those cops with the bowler hats. The ones in the late 19th century in London. You know the Bobbies. I think named after the first UK police commissioner Robert Peel.

  27. ohmstead

    Nick Cave doing his best “If Freddy had lived” impersonation.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBX4H06FWd8&feature=

  28. A loyal cop ‘stache wearer!

  29. I’m still waiting for our fellow townsman (or woman) to come clean about their former cop-stache. The photos are out there.

  30. ohmstead

    Alright LM – a duel to the death…the ultimate singing, ‘stached hoofer:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n4zRe_wvJw8

  31. alexmagic

    http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/252/13574467.jpg
    Frank Beard famously does not have a beard, but he will ask you to please stay in the car and show him your license and registration.

    (That said, I kinda want to disqualify him because his hair in that picture thoroughly transforms the look from solid Cop ‘Stache to “Retired Pitcher Trying To Transition Into Manager Or Maybe One Of Them TV Jobs Or You Know Whatever Man It’s Cool”.)

  32. I’m willing to admit, but not visually substantiate, that I had about a 3 month period in college where I copped a Freddie Prinze (the elder) look. Kind of a cop of the barrio. (Not) “Looking Goood.” But I can’t be the only one.

  33. ladymisskirroyale

    Hoisted on my own petard!

  34. Stache, sunglasses, cop shaped hat, and the appropriate title: I give you the Captain.

    http://us.7digital.com/artist/captain-tennille/release/the-ultimate-collection-captain-and-tennille

  35. Feel better?

  36. My post-2008 World Series Victory Lap ‘stache would not have qualified for this competition. It was only fit for undercover narc work.

    https://www.rocktownhall.com/blogs/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Jimmustache.jpg

  37. You and andyr had matching cop ‘staches when he first introduced me to you. Good Look!

  38. Nothing to see here. Move along.

  39. Dude, you were awesome in Life on Mars! I hope there’s a sequel.

    http://www.zimbio.com/pictures/XHTitf6qnqG/Michael+Imperioli+Filming+Life+Mars+NYC/a9atWH2Cr6H

  40. 2000 Man

    Justin Bieber got into his mom’s makeup box:

    http://allieiswired.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/justin-bieber-moustache.jpg

    He doesn’t look much like a cop, but I bet one would beat him up. I mean, who wouldn’t?

  41. Yeah, and don’t let me catch you drinking some sissy vodka.

  42. You may have to win something for digging that up.

  43. alexmagic

    Does The Captain count? I mean, I gotta think he’s forced to keep his mustache like that per strict Navy regulations.

  44. meanstom

    http://discosalt.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/george_harrison.jpg

    Not enough to win, I’m sure, but George Harrison flirted with a law-abiding ‘stache in the ’70s.

  45. True. But they’ve since implemented Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, Don’t Trim.

  46. That’s a good one! One of the things that makes Freddie’s cop ‘stache so strong is that he’s got accompanying cop hair. This shot of Pat Fear attains a similar balance.

  47. If only Jeff Kent was holding an ax instead of a bat he’d clean up in this competition. Cops keep a picture of him on their precinct bulletin boards to illustrate proper cop ‘stache form.

    http://cdn.bleacherreport.net/images_root/slides/photos/000/131/045/252489.jpg.11424.0_display_image.jpg?1262066248

  48. ohmstead

    This is actually a brilliant submission. I am chagrined that I didn’t think of it myself. And it’s really a two-fer since the Captain not only presents a very solid cop ‘stache but can also pull off a passable Magnum P.I. (in his retirement years).

    http://www.tvguide.com/news/captain-tennille-dvd-38695.aspx

  49. ladymisskirroyale

    Dear Tom, I know you are too modest to show this to your loyal fans, but I think they should be aware:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93mO5rR-4Tg

  50. ohmstead

    George has already made an appearance…but check out Paul…could be eligible:

    http://stachist.com/2010/07/mustache-music-monday-the-beatles/

    (And BTW – be sure to check out the “yacht rock” of Mustache Harbor – http://mustacheharbor.com/)

  51. Slim Jade

    Frankie Say Paul Rutherford!

  52. Pat Fear aka Bill Bartell ….supposedly was a cop at some point and then a cowboy. The Muffs say that he’s on his way to being all of the Village People.

  53. Dang, in my mind I can totally picture Jimmy Buffett with a straight up winner but all I can find on the internet is him with a Freystache, originally made popular by on of Eagles.

    http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aqpmqfe_YQo/T7ktJfacYyI/AAAAAAAACNw/iy8heSgsvvM/s1600/449367.jpg

  54. 2000 Man

    All vodka is for sissies. Michael Imperioli drinks Tequila. Straight. And that’s what he calls a cocktail.

  55. Only sissies drink tequila when they could be draining a bottle of Mezcal then smoking the worm. I say Imperioli and I regrow our ‘staches, let our hair down, and go toe to toe.

  56. Slim Jade

    Maybe a stupid question at this point, and frankly I don’t feel like scanning through the entries, but has anyone mentioned “Construction Guy” from The Village People?

  57. I’m pretty sure no one has…until now!

  58. Ironically, the cop does not have a cop-stache.

  59. Just a few more hours to go until the entry period closes and Officer Selleck determines our winners!

  60. Ok, here are a couple last minute efforts…Mr. JY Young had this reasonable effort for quite a while I believe

    http://www.lockgen.com/mystyx/articles/jysept94.html

    While Mr. Prine went through many hairy looks, but this was a fair standard
    http://www.angelfire.com/nd/satnight/oct21.html
    (scroll down to his photo-the 2nd)

  61. Two more good ones to wrap up entries! Stay tuned as we announce our winners this weekend!

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