Jun 072013
 

Daryl Hall is apparently getting his on restoration show on the DIY Channel, in which he will “restore a 1-bedroom house in Connecticut that had originally been built circa 1780 by a widowed sea captain.” I’ve subsisted with rabbit ears for about 3 years now but if any show has tempted me to get cable again, this is it. So many questions, including:

  • Why?
  • Will there be musical interludes?
  • Why would the DIY channel approach Daryl Hall rather than someone known for their DIY can-do attitude like Henry Rollins or the guys in Fugazi, or Bon Iver, whom I assume built his own log cabin in the woods?
  • Will Oates be relegated to just handing the screwdriver to Daryl or will he actually have a more hands-on role in creating the finished project?
If I had a hammer...

If I had a hammer…

The reality TV show craze is fascinating to me. It’s been going on for 22 years now (if The Real World is considered to be the show that ushered in the era), and I am amazed at the resourcefulness of the various shows’ creators to come up with ideas for new series. Whoever came up with the idea for a show about people who fish by punching catfish in the mouth deserves some sort of lifetime achievement award.

To paraphrase Homer Simpson, “You don’t need to invent something new, you just need to put a clock radio in something that already exists.” So, this Daryl Hall thing has got me wondering:

  • What other already existing reality TV show could benefit from having a Rock Star replace the ordinary schnooks currently cluttering up the screen?
  • Who would you like to see restoring a house?
  • Which wives would you want to see on the Real Housewives of Rock Stars?
  • Who would you like to see in a Hell’s Kitchen style cook-off?
  • Which Rock Star would you want to see engage in a little old fashioned Hillbilly Handfishing?

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  7 Responses to “Is This the Real Life?”

  1. I’ve been meaning to write about that show in which musicians come to Daryl’s house to jam with him and his band. This may change everything. Will the historic house require the building of an historic recording studio, complete with a Ben Franklin glass organ?

    As my placement of the trailer for the excellent film The Ghost and Mrs. Muir suggests, has Hall’s identification with a widowed sea captain been the explanation behind his long-puzzling blond “why bother?” beard?

    I think musical interludes will be part of the show, with Hall seen playing period pieces, performing “Your Kiss Is On My Lips” on the harpsichord, for instance. He’ll become a kind of American version of Lute-master Sting. (I hope I’m not offending any Americans by making this comparison.)

    I think Hall’s highlights are the reason he got the job over the artists you mention. He looks like a suburban housewife – with a sea captain’s beard – who would be fit to make life miserable for a team of contractors. I suspect Hall’s main tool will be his checkbook. (I hope I haven’t offended any suburban housewives overseeing home renovation jobs.)

    Oates, I’ve been told, is an expert at plastering walls.

    As for putting rock stars to use on reality shows, I’d like to see them appear on Storage Wars: Tom Jones, Kid Rock, Joan Jett, and Elton John (slipping back into his hoarding ways, greasing the skids for an eventual appearance on Rock ‘n Roll Hoarders).

    I would like to see Peter Garrett of Midnight Oil restore a house. With his bare hands.

    Real Housewives of Rock Stars…that’s not cool, man. Do we really need to stoop to this?

    The cook-off should include Greg Norton from Husker Du, Jon Bon Jovi, Chrissie Hynde (who would throw a fit anytime meat showed up in her basket), and Kelly Hogan.

    I had no idea this Hillbilly show existed! Participants would include Robert Plant, Kelly Hogan, Keef, and John Mellencamp.

  2. BigSteve

    I’m addicted to Live From Daryl’s House. Of course the visiting musicians vary in interest a great deal, but I dig watching those insanely proficient session guys play. As time has gone on, the show has gotten much more structured. The early internet only shows were much looser and more interesting, especially the Nick Lowe episode: http://www.livefromdarylshouse.com/currentep.html?ep_id=37

    After T-Bone Wolk died the whole character of the show changed.

  3. cherguevara

    What other already existing reality TV show could benefit from having a Rock Star replace the ordinary schnooks currently cluttering up the screen?

    Survivor. Keith Richards. Ted Nugent. And put Elton John on there too, just to see him squirm.

    Who would you like to see restoring a house?

    Kraftwerk. I bet they measure at least three times before cutting once.

    Which wives would you want to see on the Real Housewives of Rock Stars?

    This is a tough one, since I don’t think I know who any of these people are. I guess the current Mrs. McCartney. Gwynneth Paltrow, perhaps?

    Who would you like to see in a Hell’s Kitchen style cook-off?

    Sammy Hagar vs. Sly Stone

    Which Rock Star would you want to see engage in a little old fashioned Hillbilly Handfishing?

    Any member of Depeche Mode, or perhaps Simon LeBon.

  4. I had no idea that show dates back that far. Seeing Hall without Oates disturbs me, but I do get some pleasure out of that show. Once they sit down to eat I usually flip channels.

  5. “Kraftwerk. I bet they measure at least three times before cutting once.” Perfect!

    Also, I think you might be onto something with Elton John. Maybe the concept is to place him in all the various reality shows.

  6. cliff sovinsanity

    What other already existing reality TV show could benefit from having a Rock Star replace the ordinary schnooks currently cluttering up the screen?

    Pawn Stars: Prince, as a customer because I’m sure he has something absolutely bizarre he would like to get rid of.
    Storage Wars: Prince, as a storage locker owner, see above.
    American Pickers: Prince, see above.
    Intervention: Mike Love, if not for the parade of stupid hats

    Who would you like to see in a Hell’s Kitchen style cook-off?
    Ted Nugent (meat) VS Chrissie Hynde (veg)

    Which Rock Star would you want to see engage in a little old fashioned Hillbilly Handfishing?
    Rhianna

  7. 2000 Man

    What other already existing reality TV show could benefit from having a Rock Star replace the ordinary schnooks currently cluttering up the screen?

    I’d like to see The Real World with Katy Perry, Kesha, Rhianna and Adele as the women, and Meat Loaf, Chuck Berry, Mick Jagger and Jack White as the men.

    Who would you like to see restoring a house?

    Jello Biafra

    Which wives would you want to see on the Real Housewives of Rock Stars?

    Just Patti Hansen. She’s more than enough.

    Who would you like to see in a Hell’s Kitchen style cook-off?

    Emmylou Harris down home cookin’ vs. Linda Ronstadt’s Taco’s.

    Which Rock Star would you want to see engage in a little old fashioned Hillbilly Handfishing?

    Little Richard

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