Following my thoughts the other day on how much I would have liked to have chosen Booker T & the MGs as my teammates for a pickup game of hoops, I got to thinking about other pickup sporting events and which musicians I might like on my side. I’ll share my thoughts on the matter as they are fully developed. Meanwhile, which artists would you choose in a pickup game for each of the following sports? Please choose full bands for any team sports (and as many as 2–3 full bands for sports requiring more than a handful of players) and solo artists or duos for sports involving 2 or 3 players per team. No picking the best players from any given band and leaving the weak links off your roster! Remember, you need to play as well; you’re part of the count—no subs. It is recommended that you choose musicians who will compliment your game.
- Rough touch football (7 v 7)
- Schoolyard basketball (5 v 5)
- Doubles tennis (2 v 2)
- Small-sided indoor or artificial turf court soccer (7 v 7)
- Beach volleyball (2 v 2)
- Softball (10 v 10)
- Street hockey (6 v 6)
- Professional tag-team wrestling (2 v 2)
Choose sides!
Billy Bragg used to quip that he would have liked to play five-a-side football with the Four Skins, although it would be tricky as they would all want to play on the left wing.
I hated sport at school and it has made no noticeable impact on any aspect of my life since. No song has ever said it better than this
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L2Jn1UvS8GM
I just knew what song you were going to reference even before I clicked on that link.
Anyway, I think that two English groups that would make good teammates in a sport would be the Hollies and Madness since from what I’ve read & seen, both bands seem to like & get along w/each other, although I have my suspecions about Graham Nash.
For rough touch football, I’m sticking with Booker T & The MGs and adding in tour mates Sam & Dave. Booker remains at QB, and I defy you to find a team that can stop Sam, Dave, Cropper, Jackson and Dunn from scoring. The MGs provide solid coverage on defense, freeing Sam & Dave to be ballhawks. Plus, Steve Cropper strikes me as a guy who would lay some people out if things got really rough out there.
I actually like our chances better with me as the seventh guy instead of Otis Redding, since I would be content to snap the ball to Booker and block for him for the two seconds it would take one of our weapons to get open instead of taking snaps away, and I also wouldn’t be trying to make Sam & Dave look dumb every few plays.
Pro wrestling tag-team: I stick with Sam & Dave, only they’re wearing matching Mexican wrestling masks so opponents can’t tell them apart, allowing them to switch in and out of the match at will. I would serve as their manager (The Soul Man), wearing a suit to match theirs but accenting it with an ascot and a turban. We’d come to the ring with Sam & Dave performing “Hold On, I’m Comin'” live down the aisle.
As another odd, sport(s) hating boy, I knew it was going to be that song, too….Well, occasionally I’ll watch women’s gymnastics (or swimming…or volleyball), but that’s about the extent of my interest…
Thanks for kicking this of in earnest, alexmagic. Your rough touch football squad is formidable. You keep the MGs for football, while I’ll claim them for hoops.
For rough touch football team I need a combination of power, grace, and facial hair. I’m taking the classic Allman Brothers of the Fillmore East era.
My defensive line will be anchored by Jai Johanny Johnanson (aka Jaimoe) at the nose guard and Gregg Allman and Butch Trucks on the outside. Duane’s my middle linebacker and playcaller on D. I’ll play the other LB, focusing on covering the tight end and backs coming out for screens. Dickie’s our strong safety, and Berry Oakley is our free safety.
Dickie runs the offense. He’s more of a technician and game manager at quarterback than gunslinger, but should the opportunity arise sling he will to Duane and Berry. Jaimoe and I will run power sweeps from a backfield modeled after the mid-’70s LA Rams. Butch anchors the offensive line – and you better watch that Gregg slipping off a block to receive a pass over the middle!
I was going to “pince-nez” our humble Moderator to the fact that most street and pond hockey is 3 on 3, but I’m up for the challenge of 6 on 6 anyway. So, I’m thinking Canada VS USA here, with the trios of….
Rush (’nuff said) and Triumph (they’ve got hockey hair) VS Mission Of Burma (good east coast brawlers) and Brownsville Station (Midwest grinders)
I’m I sure I deserved it, cliff. Hockey is a mystery to me.
Touch football: Beach Boys circa ’64. Include David Marks to make the 6 man nut
Hoops: Pearl Jam. Used to have a hoop backstage and were originally named Mookie Blaylock. Plus their bass player looks kind of tall.
Tennis: James Taylor. I’ll bet that country club rocker played tennis at boarding school. And I loathe him so badly that it would be a blast berating any of his misplays.
Footie: Chumbawamba. Bring the stands onto the pitch for a little mayhem
Beach volleyball: Thurston Moore
Softball: Kid Rock and his crew
Street hockey: Barenaked Ladies. Don’t know how many of them there are, but it’s street hockey; does it matter?
Tag team wrestling: someone/anyone from GWAR
Thanks for not asking for a frisbee golf team. I’d hate to have to give the Blowfish any play at all.
aloha
LD
I’ve decided on another musical partner in athletic events…
Doubles tennis: I’m entering a mixed doubles tournament with Linda Rondstadt
I like your rationale for the James Taylor pick!
It’s a little like soccer, Mod, only played on ice and with a puck, which is a smallish, hard piece of black rubber, instead of a ball; and sticks instead of feet. You can occasionally catch it on tv.
Thanks, wiseguy. I meant that for all the playoff hockey I watch (over the last few years, as many as 2 hours of Flyers playoff games combined) I’m still not sure how many players are on the ice at a given time let alone rules for substitutions, etc. It was only this year that I realized that a power play goal wipes out the remaining time on a penalty, right?
Mod, if you have time, I’d love to see your pick for softball. I think that’s the most interesting one to consider. I’d also be curious to see how you’d fill out a rock baseball all-star team.
Yeah, I’m putting a lot of work into my softball team. As I’m sure you’ll agree, the key is putting together a team that – on the surface – has a lot of fun but at the same time will go all out to win. I need guys who can go first to third on a flare to rightfield, for instance, while holding a plastic cup of beer. This rules out a band I may want on my team for hard, CCR. So a competitive band that knows how to put on a “good-time” face for the audience…
I’ll start with George Thorogood and the original Delaware Destroyers: drummer Jeff Simon, bassist Billy Blough, and guitarist Ron “Roadblock” Smith – before the add-on sax player, please. These guys aren’t my most dynamic players, but they’ll be able to hold down corner outfield positions (Thorogood’s got a wicked arm), catch, and soft-toss pitch. Each of them can do their parts with a beer close at hand and a big grin on their face. They’ve already taken on ZZ Top (at least in my mind), so there’s no doubt they play to win. Those 4 and me make 5 players.
Now, onto my “dynamic” guys, my “tools” players…I wanted to go with Sly and the Family Stone, but they would put me over my roster limit. You know what, I’m gonna keep it local, because softball is a neighborhood game. I’m rounding out my team with The O’Jays’ classic trio lineup from the Backstabbers era and Hall and Oates. I hear some of you laughing, but Oates is a pest on the basepaths, and Hall has excellent range in centerfield.
I’m not ready to put together a hardball roster just yet.
Nobody’s picking the Silver Bullet Band for softball or the Wailers for Soccer? I thought they would be shoe-ins.
My original pick, sans the bad attitude, was Carly Simon by the same reasoning. So just sub in her for my mixed doubles team. Mmmm, Carly in a tennis skirt…hey now!
aloha
LD
Most of the time a power play goal will end the opposing teams penalty. Unless it’s a five minute major.
Still confused….
http://adhilde.hubpages.com/hub/Basic-Rules-NHL-Hockey-Visual-Guide