Dec 092011
 

First of all; not that kind of contraction.

What I am talking about here is probably more familiar to fans of professional hockey than the general public.

I am not talking about, “The shortening and thickening of functioning muscle or muscle fiber” (thanks Dictionary.com).

I am talking about “the act of decreasing (something) in size or volume or quantity or scope” (thanks again, boys).

As in The New Jersey Devils, which are the unintended result of hockey failing both in Colorado and Kansas City in the 1970s.

The New Jersey Devil’s, for those not familiar, have won three Stanley Cups since contraction. Three.

Where the hell am I going with this? Glad you asked.

Wouldn’t rock and roll be better served with a little contraction? What if the forces that be determined there were just too many bands. What should be done? Do we really need all these alt-country bands? What if Neko Case sang lead for Wilco with that guy who used to be with Drive by Truckers backing her? Better?

What if all these touring Yacht Rock Revivalists formed just one band: The Dan-Dooby Loggins Band, featuring Michael McDonald. Wouldn’t you want to rock to those smooth jams?

Contract away, Rock Town Hollas

 

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  16 Responses to “Rock and Roll Contraction”

  1. I fully support this initiative. I would contract the Byrds, Flying Burrito Brothers, and Bernie Leadon’s work with Eagles.

  2. hrrundivbakshi

    I would contract so many third-string British Invasion bands from the mid-60s that we’d end up with a Rockestra-like assemblage of Dreamers, Pacemakers, Hermits, Hollies and others.

    BTW, you may take my Pacemakers nod for your 64 bracket, come to think of it.

  3. The Flaming Raspberry Fingers.

  4. cherguevara

    The Neu Can?

  5. I would do the same with 80’s poodle-metal bands.

  6. pudman13

    Considering that there are about 1000 albums per year that end up on some published top 10 list, I think it’s time to consolidate just so that we can actually determine what’s good anymore.

  7. I would to see contraction in the ocean rock genre — Surfer Beach Wavves.

  8. hrrundivbakshi

    I would like to see a contraction in the 70s Cali-Oblivion Rock genre: merge the Eagles with Jackson Browne. I think those two would help each other a great deal.

  9. I like how Arcade Fire has offered to single-handedly contract all bands influenced by U2, Springsteen, or The Cure. All bands who model themselves after any one of those artists can just break up and let Arcade Fire do the heavy lifting.

  10. cliff sovinsanity

    You sir, are a genius.

  11. cliff sovinsanity

    How’s about a Pavement/Sebadoh/Built To Spill combo? Dual lead singers, with Malkamus the wise cracker for the upbeat stuff, and Lou Barlow the dour depressed ones.

  12. cherguevara

    And Echo and the Bunnymen too.

  13. Pavement and Sebadoh are more straight-up indie rock, tho. BtS I’d put with Sunny Day Real Estate and maybe like Jesu and whatchamacallit…My Bloody Valentines

    When the next best-100 whatevers is published, I wonder if it could be boiled down to 50 via contraction!

  14. cliff sovinsanity

    Good point. I included BtS for some flashy guitar work. I guess I could have included Dinosaur Jr. since Lou and J have made peace.

  15. Happiness Stan

    How about Lou Reed and Metallica? Oh, hang on a minute…

  16. Any thoughts on Rap Contraction?

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