Spotlight On: Acceptance Speeches at the GRAMMYS

To set the tone, Townswoman Crystal puts the spotlight on GRAMMYS acceptance speeches. This is just one of many keys we will offer to enable you to experience maximum enjoyment of this otherwise obligatory event.

“Wu Tang is for the Children,” ODB once said as he interrupted Shawn Colvin’s “Sonny Came Home” acceptance speech. It was probably the most exciting thing said during the 1998 GRAMMYS. In doing research for the exciting GRAMMY speech, they all tend to be the same. It’s about God or their Mom. There are tons of tears and “Oh, I didn’t except this.” There is little mention on the web of speeches pre-1987. I guess artists weren’t allowed to talk or there are no transcripts. I’m dying to get a hold of one for Barbara Streisand’s Lifetime Achievement Award.

Kayne West is frequently cited for having a fun speech: “If you have the opportunity to play the game of life, you need to appreciate every moment. I plan to celebrate and scream and pop champagne every chance I get, ’cause I’m at the GRAMMYS, baby!” he shouted. “Everybody wanted to know what I would do if I didn’t win. Well, I guess we’ll never know!”

Eh! I say run of the mill.

Eddie Vedder was self-deprecating (quel surprise!): “I don’t know what this means. I don’t think it means anything. That’s how I feel,” he said. “My dad would have liked it. But my dad died before I got to know him. … Thanks, I guess.”

Then, of course, there is the famous U2 acceptance speech for The Joshua Tree in 1987. Following are excerpts because, as we know, Bono likes to prattle on for a bit.

I’ve a bit of a list here I’d like to read out its just a few people we thought we should thank. Umm, I’ve got to be careful with this list – it’s got the boys’ votes ‘n stuff on the back…I’d like to thank Bob Dylan for “Tangled Up and Blue”, Flannery O’Connor, Jimi Hendrix, Walt Disney, John the Baptist, George Best, Gregory Peck, James T. Kirk, Morris Brat, Dr. Ruth, Batman and Robin, Lucky The Dog, Pee Wee Herman, The YMCA, Eddie the Eagle, Sumo Wrestlers throughout the world, and of course, Ronald Reagan.

The most interesting thing I found, is not the acceptance speeches but either the Lifetime Achievement Awards or the interruptions. Case in point, Michael Jackson. This has also been heavily edited because, well, he’s insane:

I love you too, thank you…I hope this puts to rest, I hope this finally puts to rest another rumor that has been in the press for too many years: Me and Janet really are two different people…

My childhood was completely taken away from me. There was no Christmas, there were no birthdays, it was not a normal childhood, nor the normal pleasures of childhood – those were exchanged for hard work, struggle, and pain, and eventually material and professional success. But as an awful price, I cannot re-create that part of my life…

…Today, I would like to thank all the children of the world, including the sick and deprived…I am so sensitive to your pain.

I also want to thank all those who have helped me to channel my talent here on earth…The wonderful, great Quincy Jones. Teddy Riley. My new godson Michael Gibb. My new Sony family, Akio Morita, Mickey Schulhoff, Tommy Motola, Dave Glew, Polly Anthony…Thanks for making one of my most creative efforts, the album Dangerous, such an incredible success. All the fantastic fans around the world – love you very much.

Finally, I’ll leave you with the precious words of the late great Old Dirty Bastard:

“Please calm down. I went and bought me an outfit today that cost me a lot of money, because I figured that Wu-Tang was gonna win,” ODB said, referring to his loss of Best rap album to P. Diddy, “I don’t know how you all see it, but when it comes to the children, Wu-Tang is for the children. We teach the children. Puffy is good, but Wu-Tang is the best. I want you all to know that this is ODB, and I love you all, peace.”