Oct 252010
 

I was never a fan of the Rolling Stones’ documentary Gimme Shelter, but I forgot how gripping and realistic this scene of understandably self-absorbed musicians listening to a playback of their latest recording was. There may be no better scene of this sort captured on film or video—or at least that’s the claim this scene is making as it shuffles triumphantly around the squared circle, arms raised, proclaiming inevitable victory before the bell has rung on this Battle Royale!

Do you have a studio playback scene to top this one? It can be from a real rock film, a fictional one, or even your own experience. All challengers for the belt will be judged on soulful gazes, knowing nods, off-mic banter, cans, artful couch slouches, wise producers/engineers, gear porn, cool observers, band members singing or air-playing along to the music, studio tans, tracking beards, Oriental rugs, and so forth.

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Sep 272010
 

Excluding talent-show performers, has any band been less talented than The Starvation Army Corps Band, as seen in this 1968 Mike Douglas Show appearance? I’m not talking about bands that are aesthetically not my cup of tea, like Journey, or producer-created bands that “fit the costume” and lip-sync, but bands that display such humble musical ability as this band of 15 and 16 year olds. From their introduction I gather that The Salvation Army Corps Band made it to national television as a cutesy favor to Mike’s guest, but who the guest is and why her son’s band merited inclusion on the broadcast are mysteries to me.

On the other hand, there’s no mistaking what led the following contender in this Battle Royale to its national television booking: Continue reading »

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May 242010
 

FUN BOY THREE LOSES BELT TO MANDY MOORE (SEE COMMENTS)!

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Fun Boy Three covering “The End” challenges all comers to a Battle Royale!

Can you name one cover song more unexpected than Fun Boy Three covering this Doors classic? You may try, but proceed at your own caution. Note how there is not the slightest hint of irony in the band’s performance. This is the real deal, baby, and it’s chilling in its unexpectedness!

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Mar 052010
 

Disqualified!

Until the moment I put the finishing touches on this post I had no idea that actor Jeff Bridges had recorded an album of music. He seems to be a shoo-in to win the Oscar for Best Actor this Sunday night, but as a result of having released an album of his musical performances other than whatever he performs in his recent film, Crazy Heart, he is disqualified from this Battle Royale.

Specifically I’m asking that we determine the best portrayal of a musician (including actual musical performances) by a typically non-musician actor.

The actor needs to be portraying a musician; he or she cannot simply break out into song as a teenage greaser in a musical set at Rydell High. Beside, John Travolta, like Jeff Bridges, would also be disqualified for having released his own albums.

John Travolta, “Razzamatazz”

John Travolta, “Easy Evil”

Furthermore the actor needs to actually perform music in the film. Despite having seen the film about a half dozen times, I’m not sure if I know whether Justine Bateman or Julia Roberts actually played and/or sang in Satisfaction. Please research this issue before nominating either one of them. Same goes for Mary Stuart Masterson in Some Kind of Wonderful and countless other actors who were so convincing that it’s hard to tell if they could really play.

A few more contenders before I ask you to put on your thinking caps and hash this out…
Continue reading »

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Feb 052010
 


If I heard right, while listening to Black Flag‘s “Slip It In” on the drive into work, Henry Rollins introduces Greg Ginn‘s freakout solo and generally orgasmic fade out with the command to “Mount up!” You can hear it for yourself at the 5:15 mark of this video.

If there is a better vocal intro to a guitar solo than Henry Rollins’ command to “Mount up!” then this is the place to prove it!

Which vocal intro to an instrumental solo dares step inside the squared circle?

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Jan 212010
 

I was poking around in the archives and I came across a discussion in which folks were talking about starting a thread to determine once and for all which rock band has the best logo. I don’t think that discussion ever materialized so I’m starting it here.

What is the Greatest Rock Logo of All Time?

Please don’t just say the name, show your work too. And don’t let your personal taste about the band’s music affect your appreciation of their branding skills.

I’m going to go with…
Continue reading »

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Oct 262009
 

Lemmy Kilmister is featured in the current issue of Rolling Stone. The writer called him “rock and roll’s Zelig,” and I think the article laid out a pretty compelling case for him: He was Jimi Hendrix’s roadie; he gave Sid Vicious bass lessons; he attended some of The Beatles‘ Cavern Club shows. On top of all that, he’s Lemmy, for chrissake.

Is there anyone else who has a greater claim Rock and Roll Zelig? Please confine your answers to musicians. I don’t want this to turn into a catfight between Bebe Buell and Pamela Des Barres.

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