See if you can’t match the 1970s artists with the 1970s prepackaged foods.

Tools of the trade!

Do The Kidz still go out the night before Halloween and wreak mild havoc for Mischief Night? Remember that? Kids would rub eggs on car windows, put toilet paper on neighbors’ bushes, and so forth. I assume Mischief Night was “celebrated” all across America. (Now that I think of it, I have no idea what our ex-US Townspeople do for Halloween, if anything.)

I was a goody-two shoes as a kid and only went out for Mischief Night one time. I took my little brother, who was way more badass than I’d ever be, even when he was 7, down the street from us, where I went to catch my bus to school each morning. First we broke eggs on some guy’s car window and rubbed them across the glass. That was fun. Then I had the bright idea of placing an empty beer bottle on the side of the road right in the middle of the road, where an unsuspecting car was likely to run over it. Then I had the even brighter idea of convincing  my brother that we should sit back from the road, beside a shrub, and wait for the sparks to fly, so to speak. Within a minute I got my wish. A car ran smack over the bottle, which shattered. I’d never felt so mischievous in my life! I thought I could get used to this way of living.

Then, what I did not wish for or ever stop to consider happened: the driver slammed on the breaks, pulled over, and quickly spotted my brother and I giggling in the bushes. We tried to run, but he got us. He gave us a wicked tongue lashing and threatened to tell our Mom. Luckily his tire did not suffer a flat, and he took mercy on us. That was the first and last time I would celebrate Mischief Night.

Anyhow, I was wondering what a Rock ‘n Roll Mischief Night might look like. What mischief could rock nerds like ourselves create if we decided to hit our local clubs and record stores and music stores and friends’ music collections? Based on my history with this holiday, I would be wise to sit this one out, but tell me what I may be missing. Feel free, too, to share your personal stories of Mischief Night, which I hope you’ve moved past celebrating.

Let it Rock!

Maybe this has happened already in the history of rock, but if not, can Rock Town Hall collectively design the Zardoz of rock?

I know some of you find director John Boorman‘s 1974 sci-fi flick starring a ponytailed, Zappata-mustachioed Sean Connery running around in a silk diaper/mankini through a world full of identically built hippie handmaidens wearing loose-fitting halter tops “interesting,” but any time I see this film I’m stunned that a post-Bond Connery would appear in something this, uh, interesting. We’re talking the Ultimate James Bond here, so if we can’t find a major band or solo artist coming off their best-known series works to release a ridiculous, futuristic concept album, let’s create such a scenario.

I’m not the world’s greatest fan of The Who‘s Tommy, which can be seen as a pretty ridiculous concept, but there’s some great rock ‘n roll on that record. The post-Saturday Night Fever Bee Gees‘ doing the Sgt. Pepper‘s movie may come close to what I’m looking for, but that debacle was centered around the movie—and even at their commercial peak most of us wouldn’t have expected much more artistically out of the brothers Gibb. Nothing ever released by Styx qualifies. That band blows. I need a post-Bond—level Titan of Rock running around in a musical mankini.

I look forward to the beast we identify and/or create.

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