May 152009
 

Here’s an oldie but goodie I thought might be worth revisiting. Please read the set-up closely: the Rock ‘n Roll Mendoza line is meant to identify something more than a 1-hit wonder not even worthy of further consideration as a strong artist. The first time this ran we had some good feedback from a number of Townspeople who’ve been less active of late or checked out altogether. Now that you’re here, feel free to extend this discussion.

This post initially appeared 0/13/07.

You know what baseball’s Mendoza Line is, right? Named after former Pittsburgh Pirates’ light-hitting shortstop, Mario Mendoza, it refers to a sub-.200 batting average, the surest sign of offensive failure in the sport.

Today I’d like to hear about Your Rock ‘n Roll Mendoza Line, that point at which an artist who has at least 1 song that you really like yet has by demerit of the bulk of said artist’s output completely failed in your ears and eyes. Is there a particular band or artist that defines Your Rock ‘n Roll Mendoza line?

Click here to watch Frank Black’s “Headache” video. (Thanks, Viacom!)

For me it’s Frank Black. I was never a fan of The Pixies beside a song or two on Doolittle, so right there we’re talking 2 for the band’s entire output. Then I heard a single from his first solo album, “Headache”, and I thought this guy might turn out to be my new, favorite artist. Do you know this song? It sounds like something Pere Ubu might do in a poppier moment. Really fun video to boot!

I rushed out and bought the album, Teenager of the Year. This album has about 22 songs on it, maybe a few more than that. There had to be some other gems on it. But nooooooooooooo! All the other songs on the album were atrocious. I’ve held onto the album for that one song and in hopes of eventually finding other songs with charms I’d missed the first 20 times through. So far, no dice!

To me, this critically acclaimed artist with only 3 songs I really like spread across probably 6 to 8 albums I’ve heard defines My Personal Rock ‘n Roll Mendoza Line. Remember, Frank Black is not some 1-hit wonder. It’s not like I’m bitching about not hearing more good song from the complete works of Mungo Jerry. I’d like to hear about the band or artist that defines your line.

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  47 Responses to “Your Rock ‘n Roll Mendoza Line”

  1. Sheryl Crow. I really like “Soak Up the Sun,” which I think is one of the great unapologetically goofy summer singles of the last decade or so. However, the rest of her material is so beyond hacky and derivative that I think that even if she had been around in the late ’70s like she clearly wishes she was, she still would have been a complete third-stringer.

    Also, she looks weirdly like a horse. I’m sorry, she just does.

  2. Mr. Moderator

    Great one, Great One! You get the idea. She is a chestnut mare.

  3. She is a chestnut mare.

    So funny! Great Byrdsian quote;) I’m tryin’ to think… I guess I could say the same for The Seeg, at least for me. My mum is like the biggest Seger fan ever, and his vocals just continually irritate the shit out of me, but I can’t get enough of the drums and bass on Ramblin’ Gamblin’ Man. Guilty Pleasure.

  4. Don Henley. I think “Boys of Summer” is a really well done song, and there’s a few Eagles songs he had a hand in that I can tolerate. But he’s got this vibe about him that just bugs the crap out of me.

  5. The Wallflowers. “One Headlight” is astounding. his dad must’ve written it for him. The rest of the Jacob Dylan output sounds like fake Tom Petty(which is fake Bob Dylan)mixed with Counting Crows, who suck just as bad but DON’T even have 1 good song to speak of. I’ve got about 10 more Mendoza Liners. I will post them throughout the day. I’m a Blog Town Hall-jacker!

  6. Matthew Sweet. He’s got maybe half-a-dozen good songs, and the rest are utterly bland.

  7. Mr. Moderator

    Excellent one, Townsman Shawn! This is not to slight the rest of you and your fine examples. Keep ’em coming!

    For me, Matthew Sweet suprasses the Mendoza Line, but disputing any of your opinions is the last thing I want to do.

    Peter Gabriel-era Genesis is another for me. I really like the song “The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway”; almost everything else by that critically acclaimed lineup fails to impress me. Even when smoking bad hash!

    Remember, avoid outright 1-hit wonders. No Mungo Jerrys!

  8. mwall

    Lenny Kravitz. I don’t quite love that “Fly Away” song, or whatever it’s called, but it’s always much better than the other songs around it on what passes for rock radio around here. Otherwise, it’s all weak grounders and the occasional pop out.

  9. Kravitz is a good one, though I would go with “Are You Gonna Go My Way?” rather than “Fly Away,” which always sounded too much like Soundgarden’s “Pretty Noose” to me.

  10. Kravitz got up to about .210 with “Where Are We Runnin'” but otherwise he’s a good choice.

    But I’m gonna go with Lou Reed. “Sweet Jane,” Rock ‘n’ Roll” and see ya later.

  11. sammymaudlin

    I never heard that Frank Black song. Wow. It makes the stuff I do like of his sound worse. Are you sure he wrote that song? It’s not a Yarbirds cover or something?

    But really more to the point, I think I’m in love with that young lady in the pink trousers. She should quite smoking though. Bad for the health and all.

  12. Motley Crue. 2 brilliant Albums. 9 sucky ones, and about 4 greatest hits records, which confuses me alot. Their career average is downright painful. I STILL listen to those first 2 records…often!
    Shameful Admission: Motley Crue’s Helter Skelter is what made me start listening to the Beatles as a 7th grader in 1986.
    Shocking Revelation: Vince Neil is Mexican. (cantcha kinda tell now that he’s gettin older?)

  13. Aerosmith. 4 and a half Albums of the greatest American Blues based rock ever produced! Followed by 3(countem)DECADES of complete nonsense. I kind of like the stuff from Done With Mirrors and Rock in a Hard Place better than the stuff from Pump and Get a Grip ’cause, while it’s all shit, at least I didn’t have to hear the former on the radio.
    Shameful Admission: I felt some kind of weird vindication when “Walk This Way” got re-released with RUN-DMC
    Shocking Revelation: Joe Perry now has his own hot sauce!

  14. BigSteve

    Motley Crue. 2 brilliant Albums.

    Brilliant? Two whole albums?

  15. Too Fast for Love and Shout at the Devil.
    Go ahead, deny it.

  16. BigSteve

    Too Fast for Love and Shout at the Devil.
    Go ahead, deny it.

    I deny it thrice.

  17. Mr. Moderator

    There’s no topping that line, BigSteve!

  18. I know that “Jump The Shark” was another topic altogether here, but I think that Aerosmith jumped the shark when they got sober.

    Holy crap have they been incredibly boring and annoying for at least 20 years.

    I wonder what Mario Mendoza thinks of the “Mendoza Line”. 😉

  19. I know that “Jump The Shark” was another topic altogether here, but I think that Aerosmith jumped the shark when they got sober.

    Holy crap have they been incredibly boring and annoying for at least 20 years.

    I don’t think sobriety caused them to suck. I think they ran out of ideas, and no amount of substance abuse could change that. Is it any wonder that their best album in 24 years was a covers album?

    And, while they may be boring on record, they were a smoking live act when I saw them three years ago.

  20. Mr. Moderator

    I actually like a lot of Aerosmith’s post-sobriety music better than the band’s “classic” era, not because they’re sober but because the songs have more focused hooks, less overblown guitar wanking and hoodoo-voodoo from Tyler. For me, perhaps no song goes from PROMISING to BORING than “Sweet Emotion”. I think it typifies a lot of the band’s best-loved material.

  21. And, while they may be boring on record, they were a smoking live act when I saw them three years ago.

    Seconded. Last year too.

  22. saturnismine

    The Gin Blossoms are, for me, a classic Mendoza Line band.

    So is Elastica. I loved that hit they had. Nothing else has come close.

    The Breeders, too. Beyond the high points of their hit album, there aint much there for me.

  23. sammymaudlin

    I don’t know how but I ended up watching a very different Headache video here- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5145NXPHHV0

  24. general slocum

    Aerosmiths Get Your Wings album is their high point to me. The rare 2d album better than the 1st. We brought home the first album having no idea who they were and after two listens I thought, “Christ! I hope I never have to hear ‘Dream On’ again!” Foolish child! I agree with many here, though the Eagles, for one example, never get the one hit at all with me. Alice Cooper, of course, if you liked any of his first three or four (I did), you couldn’t even discern whether he was still making albums after “School’s Out” or so. Grand Funk went from fun rock trio straight into tired self parody, but I think it was more than halfway through their tenure at that point.

  25. everything Art said.

  26. general slocum

    And speaking of Brad Whittford, I remember years ago watching a documentary on Aerosmith, where Tyler went on and on (edited down from 14 hours, I reckon) like every junkie you’ve ever met, about how he really sees clearly now for the first time in years, &c. Anyhow when it came time to talk about Whittford, it really went into Spinal Tap. Everybody saying, “Yeah! Yeah. Brad, now… Brad is, let me tell you, one of the most underrated guitarists. I mean he, uh is…” On and on, and they show him playing ten different segments of the utmost adequacy. Not that he couldn’t probably kick my butt around a guitar, but it isn’t in his job description with Aerosmith. Along with Perry and Tyler, he has a very Mad Magazine Parody-able face. That is why his name gets remembered enough to be an answer in today’s poll.

  27. Mr. Moderator

    Townsman Andyr shared his Mendoza Line artist with me this evening at dinner. It was illuminating and something that shouldn’t have surprised me. Perhaps he’ll share in the morning!

  28. And speaking of Brad Whittford, I remember years ago watching a documentary on Aerosmith…

    The “Making of Pump” documentary? That’s a classic. Watch the band and the suits work together to create multi-platinum product! Highly recommended.

  29. Brad Whitford is a hessian.

  30. Yes, Mr Mod – My Mendoza line pick is…Neil Young. I really only like Cinnamon Girl and Heart of Gold . Everything else just bores me.

  31. Yes, Mr Mod – My Mendoza line pick is…Neil Young. I really only like Cinnamon Girl and Heart of Gold . Everything else just bores me.

    I agree. I’ve been trying to find a way in to liking NY for years and still haven’t found it.

  32. Mr. Moderator

    Andyr, I imagine you like all those prominent kick drum accents in “Heart of Gold”.

  33. hrrundivbakshi

    Mr. Mod said:

    Andyr, I imagine you like all those prominent kick drum accents in “Heart of Gold”.

    I say:

    Geez, the way you two henpeck each other about the most trivial sub-components of secondary backing groove elements — it’s a wonder you ever get *anything* done!

  34. hrrundivbakshi

    I’ve been thinking about this, and — assuming I understand this challenge correctly — I have to go with the Velvet Underground and Bob Dylan as Mendoza Line artists. Both artists have a few songs that I really like, but most of their output leaves me completely cold. I won’t go into the reasons why here — I’m not sure RTH is the right forum for that.

  35. Both artists have a few songs that I really like, but most of their output leaves me completely cold. I won’t go into the reasons why here — I’m not sure RTH is the right forum for that.

    If this isn’t it, where is? You came “out” with R.E.M., I’m interested to hear your reasoning on Dylan and VU. Why O, why O, why O.

  36. Mr. Moderator

    A concerned Townsman wrote:

    Geez, the way you two henpeck each other about the most trivial sub-components of secondary backing groove elements — it’s a wonder you ever get *anything* done!

    What you should be marveling at is the dedication we have toward our art and the greater good of rock itself. Like General Slocum and his blind man’s ability to see more than what the rest of us see, we too are burdened by our knowledge. But it’s all right. We duke it out in rehearsals. We have axes to grind. We are brothers in rock. Almost no one benefits from our efforts, but they might some day.

  37. If this isn’t it, where is? You came “out” with R.E.M., I’m interested to hear your reasoning on Dylan and VU. Why O, why O, why O.

    Don’t hold your breath on this one. He’s been threatening to detail his problems with the VU for about two years now…

  38. Mr. Moderator

    Townsman Hrrundivbakshi, yes, you’ve got the knack of this Mendoza Line thread. Good answers, coming from you.

    I understand your concerns about RTH not being the proper forum for a discussion of your issues with these artists. There’s not further from what we try to do here than drag this information out of Townspeople. Could you send us some comment-free Billboard links? How are the earnings of industry conglomerates looking this week?

  39. hrrundivbakshi

    Scott wrote:

    Don’t hold your breath on this one. He’s been threatening to detail his problems with the VU for about two years now…

    I say:

    I’m working on it.

  40. mockcarr

    Scott wrote:

    Don’t hold your breath on this one. He’s been threatening to detail his problems with the VU for about two years now…

    Fritz’s band should be called Burlap Elevated.

  41. Brother Mr Mod wrote: What you should be marveling at is the dedication we have toward our art and the greater good of rock itself. Like General Slocum and his blind man’s ability to see more than what the rest of us see, we too are burdened by our knowledge. But it’s all right. We duke it out in rehearsals. We have axes to grind. We are brothers in rock. Almost no one benefits from our efforts, but they might some day.

    I agree with that 150%. Besides, in NH, nothing is more important, or gets more analysis, than our bass drum patterns.

  42. nice thread bitches

  43. KingEd

    Bauhaus has a couple of great originals, a cool cover or two, and then a lot of stuff that sounds the same to me. The Dali’s Car album was pretty cool. Wasn’t that a couple of guys from Bauhaus?

  44. mwall

    Yes, Mr Mod – My Mendoza line pick is…Neil Young. I really only like Cinnamon Girl and Heart of Gold . Everything else just bores me.

    “Heart of Gold” is one of the Neil Young songs that most bugs me; when he gets sentimental, I get packing.

  45. I might say that my artist is Rock Town Hall favorite XTC. I picked up most of their albums used a couple of years ago. I thought, “Wow. Here’s an artist I’ll probably really like and I can get their vatalogue really cheap!” While I haven’t sold them back, they still have left me rather cold. I keep threatening to dig them out and give good proper spins, but every time I do, I lose interest. Quickly. There’s some stuff that I really really like, but most of it just misses the mark for me. I’m missing the “XTC gene”.

    TB

  46. I have a bunch of these:

    Urge Overkill – Sister Havana and about half of Positive Bleeding
    XTC – I forget the name of the song but I’ve heard one that I like and it’s not that “Dear God” song
    Pixies – Here Comes Your Man and Debaser

    I could go on and on, but I would like to address the most prominent Medoza Line Album: Pet Sounds.

    I acknowledge that Wouldn’t It Be Nice is a pop masterpiece. Maybe one or two other songs are pretty good. Then there is a whole bunch of psychedelic show tunes with lyrics that make Jewel seem justified for publishing a book of her own “poetry”. The legendary status that this album has achieved befuddles me. I say the emperor is bare ass nekkid.

  47. For me, maybe The Church. I suppose it’s lame that I didn’t get into “Fields of Mars”, or other early tunes. I just like the Starfish album, pretty much the whole thing, and not what came before, or after.

    Oh, and Taco, of course.

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